110 / 111 – Motley Crue / Kiss Friday, July 20, 2012 – Jiffy Lube Live – Bristow, VA

MOTLEY CRUE:

The closest I’d been to Motley Crue before this concert was AC/DC three years ago.  Both bands can be loud, crude, and explosive; both shows were the musical equivalent of a monster truck rally.  The difference with Motley Crue, though, was that they rarely went beyond spectacle.  AC/DC combined its dumb fun with great solos (Angus Young’s seven-minute, full-body spin during “Let There Be Rock”) and great songs (“Hell’s Bells,” “Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap”).  Motley Crue just screeched a bunch of bad words like they were nine years old.  During one song, they literally spelled out a bodily function on a t-shirt, in flashing lights, and in a pre-song explanation.  (It had been hard to decode the lyrics the first two ways, but by the pre-song explanation, I finally got it.)

Disappointing as the lack of music or depth was, the show was not a total loss.  I had to admit it was genuinely cool seeing Tommy Lee play the drums as he and a woman from the audience flipped upside down on this Zipper-like carnival ride.  It was also nice that the pouring rain that fell during the ride to GPS-hating Bristow immediately stopped at the start of the concert.  Since no one was drowning in rain, they could appreciate the water that was sprayed from the stage after the thunderclap in "Primal Scream.”  I would have appreciated a comma in the “Thank You Virginia” banner at the end of the show, but that’s probably too much to expect from Motley Crue…

Grade: C+  

KISS:

Other than Tommy Lee’s upside-down drumming, Kiss improved on Motley Crue in every possible way:

Style: Gene Simmons soaked up all the world’s glitter during “Detroit Rock City,” spit blood during “Bass Solo,” shot a bazooka during “Shock Me,” and flew across the stage while spinning a flaming stick during “Firehouse.”  He then accurately described all this as “bada--.”     

Substance: “Shout It Out Loud” was crazy catchy; “Love Gun,” “Black Diamond,” and “War Machine” all featured solid instrumentals.  The endless confetti and fireworks during “Rock and Roll All Nite Long” might seem like pure style, but they actually fit the message of the song.  

Amusement: Watching a nebbishy dad flip out during “Shock Me”’s guitar solo was hilarious.  Virtually everything Gene Simmons said was hilarious because of that absurd voice.  He sounded like the Queen of England…if the queen happened to be Jewish, covered in face paint, and a man.  It was especially funny when he promoted his Hell or Hallelujah album by saying “today I bought it myself on iTunes!”

I doubt I’ll be going out of my way to listen to new Kiss songs, and their shtick might become stale if I saw them a second time, but it was definitely an enjoyable show.  

Grade: B+

ENDNOTES:

1.  This was the first night of both bands’ tour.  Somehow it took me 110 concerts to attend a concert at the start of a tour.   

2.  Jiffy Lube Live is huge -- way bigger than Merriweather Post Pavilion.  That doesn’t necessarily mean better, but it is significant.